The 5 Love Languages

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Excerpt From: Gary Chapman. “The 5 Love Languages.”

“1. To remind yourself that “Words of Affirmation” is your spouse’s primary love language, print the following on a card and put it on a mirror or other place where you will see it daily:

WORDS ARE IMPORTANT!   WORDS ARE IMPORTANT!   WORDS ARE IMPORTANT!
2. For one week, keep a written record of all the words of affirmation you give your spouse each day. You might be surprised how well (or how poorly) you are speaking words of affirmation.

3. Set a goal to give your spouse a different compliment each day for one month. If “an apple a day keeps the doctor away,” maybe a compliment a day will keep the counselor away. (You may want to record these compliments also, so you will not duplicate the statements.)

4. Learn to say “I love you” or other expressions of affirmation in a couple of different languages.

5. Compliment your spouse in the presence of his parents or friends. You will get double credit: Your spouse will feel loved and the parents will feel lucky to have such a great son-in-law or daughter-in-law.

6. Look for your spouse’s strengths and tell her how much you appreciate those strengths. Be specific: “I like how you reach out to people at church who don’t seem to have anyone to talk to.” Or: “You’re really keeping up with the job search. I know it’ll pay off.”7. Occasionally email or text a note of affirmation during the day or when one of you is traveling. Or if you know your spouse is having a hard day, send a link to a funny website.8. Thank your mate for something they do routinely and wouldn’t expect to be complimented for.”